Eff, what a waste of a day off. I had a dentist appointment at 8 AM this morning, so I had to get up at 6:30 (factoring in breakfast, extreme flossing, and driving time) and that was still cutting it close. I couldn't get to sleep last night so I only got about 5 hours of sleep. When I got home, I was feeling super shitty so I went back to bed... until now. Now I'm not tired but I have a pretty awful headache. I'm wondering if I should just try to soldier through homework like this, or just completely re-write my todo list and let today be a "screw it" day.

  I was a total bitch to the hygienist this morning, and I feel kinda bad about it. I gave her plenty of warning to Not Go There, though, and she Went There. She was a substitute hygienist filling in for one of the regular ladies, and she was trying to make chit-chat... which I wasn't really in the mood for in the first place. But she wanted to know what I was doing, and I said, school and work. Naturally this went to "what are you going to school for." "My masters." "But for what subject?" Oh, for the love of god, here we go. I told her "library science" and then it was straight down the old "ooooh why did you pick that, what are you going to do with that degree" slide, which wouldn't be so problematic except for the fact that I am really stressed out about the fact that I don't know what I'm going to do with that degree. I told her that I didn't know, that it was really stressing me out and I didn't like thinking about it too much, which I thought should have been red flags to turn the conversation to balloons or dogs or toilets or something, but apparently in her home country of Obliviousland these phrases actually mean "please, ask me more."

  I went on to get my masters because two BAs weren't doing anything for me, and I knew I needed to get a more specialized degree that I could actually use to get a job. I effed up royally and I know it. I got two degrees that I can't really use (because I thought they were interesting) unless I want to be a teacher, and their existence has actually helped screw me over in interviews quite a few times. Most of the people in my program are people with careers, who already have good jobs in the library system and are just getting their masters so that they can move on up. I need an entry-level position right now so that I can get the experience, but of course they're not hiring. At the very least I should be volunteering, but I don't have the time. Once I get the degree, I won't be able to get an entry-level position because I'll be "over-qualified," but I won't be able to get a higher-up position because I won't have the dang experience. It's like a ticking timebomb of joy and doom. So yes, I am stressed about it. Yes, I don't want to talk about it. Most people, except my mom, get this (my mom gets it but it's her job to worry me about it). This lady did not get it, so I basically told her the above in a very bitter manner. No, let's keep talking about this, please.

  And like some amazingly well-timed brain-poisoning seal to this conversation, she finally, finally got it and turned the conversation to something else -- which was the 2010 Olympics. Now, there's no way she could have known this, but that's a sore spot too. When I was in college, my life plan was to come home, get an okay job, save up money and move to Vancouver before 2010. Then my parents could come up and visit me and we could all go watch curling together like total dorks. And you can see how that turned out. I'll be watching the 2010 Olympics on TV, still stuck in our nation's slimy armpit, working a retail job I hate, barely making enough money to live off of, working to finish a degree that's probably going to keep me stuck right where I am instead of getting me a job.

  Hey, but at least I live with amazing people I love, and have great friends. And my mom loves me no matter how much I suck (even if she likes to remind me of it sometimes). And my car is still running pretty well. And I have a job, even though I'm only making minimum wage and it makes me want to stab myself in the eye. And I have the internet. And my warrior is level 66 in WOW, that's pretty cool.

Current Mood: blah Current Music: Ruki Vverh - Vipusknoy 2007 Current Tags: random bitching, school: grad

Dear FSU,

  Aw, hey, thanks for remembering me. What's that? You want me to donate to the Alumni Association? Okay, sure, I'll tell you what: I'll donate to your Alumni Association when those degrees I paid you for actually get me a job where I can afford to donate money all willy-nilly. Until then, stop sending me mail.

Love,
Amanda

Current Mood: amused Current Music: Sveta -Nu, Shto She Ti Current Tags: school: college

  I've been feeling really weirdly sleepy all day (not just sleepy, but like, zombie-like), and I've been napping on and off all day long and finally it feels like it wore off. It may have been the Claritin I took last night or something, even though it says non-drowsy. Or maybe I just needed a sleep day. But anyway, I kept having the weirdest dreams!

  Now, we have a not-so-bad-but-still-not-great bug problem. No matter how clean I keep this place, they still get in. Right before I went to bed last night, I think I discovered where the ones in my bathroom are coming from -- there are some big gaps right underneath the window sill, which I never would have seen if I wasn't cleaning the tub. :P So I'm sure that influenced my dream.

  The first one I can remember is that I opened my blinds because I wanted to open my window and, between the glass and the screen, there were tons of ants and black widow spiders. I went outside to kill them with spray but like, the whole outside of the house was covered in all sorts of bugs -- especially bees and wasps. It was really terrible. On the bright side, though, I discovered that our house apparently had two pools, a hot tub, and an unattached bungalow. Don't know how I didn't notice before, lol.

  Another dream I had was that I was at my mom and dad's house and I had a Xerox machine out in the front yard. Go figure... anyway, I went off down some rapids or something for a bit and came back to discover that my Xerox was gone. I discovered it a few houses down on a neighbor's yard. Apparently they stole everything that we ever put out in the yard and kept it. They felt this was appropriate because we had left things out there for over thirty minutes. I found a whole bunch of childhood toys and books that I had thought were lost, UPS packages, and yard tools out in their stash. It was just really strange. My parents were engaging in a screaming match with these psychos while I was discovering lost childhood treasures. And getting my effin' Xerox back, man.

  They weren't really that interesting but they were like the first dreams I've had in a really long time. For some reason I don't dream that much at all anymore. I think it's because school and work has sucked out all my creativity -- I don't draw or write anymore either. :/ The one about all the bugs had me seriously freaked out when I woke up, but I was still in zombie mode so I was like... way more freaked out by it then I should have been because I was still like, half-asleep and thought it was real.

  I feel bad 'cause I had yesterday off, and I really took the day off... I mean, I just played video games all day, no schoolwork, no work for Sociology or the Pepper Center, and I didn't really work on any "personal projects" either, and then Amanda K and I just hung out and watched stuff on the internet for awhile. It was nice. Every so often it's nice to have just a day off. However, I was thinking, "it's okay, I don't have to go to work till 5 on Saturday so I can do stuff then," but then I slept the day away. I will have to bust my butt tomorrow. D:

Current Mood: blank Current Music: Liza - Veselye Mal4eki (ft. Virus) Current Tags: dreams

ffffffffff Keith is on the phone now with the mortgage company. They're asking for $120K for the house which is amazing (I seriously thought they were gonna go $140K) but obviously he's hoping to bring it down a little. I can kind of hear him talking through my wall and the suspense is killliinnngg me.

Current Mood: omgomgomg Current Music: omgomgomg Current Tags: house!

  Gosh. Was just browsing jobs and saw a Data Entry position out at the space center. I can do data entry, and I like it, too, because I'm weird. But then:

FMEA/CIL data to be entered in the database is associated with hardware components in Kennedy Space Center’s Constellation Program related Ground Support Equipment (GSE) that have the potential to cause loss of life or injury to astronauts or ground personnel, or loss/damage to facilities or GSE if the hardware fails to operate properly. Therefore the candidate should value and recognize the importance of accurate data entry first & foremost and also be comfortable working with intuitive web-based programs, web browsers, Microsoft Office Word, and Adobe Reader.

  JUST ONE WRONG LETTER AND YOU JUST KILLED AN ASTRONAUT, BUDDY.

Current Mood: uncomfortable Current Tags: random

  The house inspector is coming tonight at 6:30ish. Aaaah. We are wondering if we should leave the house messy, haha. XD (Just kidding, I can't help but clean obsessively when we have a guest or stranger show up -- good thing it's my day off!) I am, however, totally going to leave the Ant Pile where it is. The Ant Pile is a group of ants that decided that outside is not for them; instead they like to import dirt into the house and build a hill against the wall in our front room. I usually vacuum it up every few days and watch the surviving ants venture out like little shocked movie characters after the end of the world. And then they rebuild. IT'S NOT WORTH THE EFFORT, ANTS. THERE IS PLENTY OF DIRT OUTSIDE.

  Anyway, I'm hoping the Ant Pile will get us "this house is not worth a million dollars" points (not just 'cause, oh, this house has ants, but more along the lines of... um, the walls of this house aren't working very well when it comes to keeping outside things outside). We're also wondering if we should like, offer this guy drinks and appetizers or something. XD

  Anyway, gotta get cleaning.

Current Mood: anxious Current Tags: house!

  Wow, I am getting so lax in posting in LJ. I used to post almost every day! It's not that I don't want to, I just have no time. First off, I know some of you are curious, so here's the low-down on the house:

1. We did not pay Shady Landlady September rent. We knew we were probably going to never hear back from her again, and thus not get our deposit back, so we left her a message on her phone informing her to keep our $1200 deposit and use it for our September rent (also $1200). Also sent a letter certified mail to cover our butts but she never picked it up from the post office and it got returned from me. Oh well!


2. The house was sold back to the mortgage company on September 23. Keith went to the auction. The bid to beat the bank was $94,000 something, which gave Keith hope that he still may be able to buy it.


3. We were able to get in contact with the mortgage company... thing and Keith has been talking to them about buying the house. At this point, we're waiting for them to call to schedule for a broker/house inspector guy to come out to take a look at the house, and then they'll decide how much they want for it. Hopefully it won't be too outrageous. This is a really nice house, except for the bugs.

  In other news, things have gotten intense around here. I don't even have time to worry about the house.

1. Work was giving me 20 hours a week which was coming to about $130 a week for me, and it wasn't really cutting it. So I was offered a third job (another FSU webpage) and I accepted it because I had the time and I needed the cash. They want me to give the website a complete redesign.


2. The Sociology webpage also needs a complete redesign (this is all FSU's fault for changing their damn layout again -- they make all the dept. pages comply to the new layout). I mean, this is great, 'cause I'm going to get a lot of money from it, but --


3. Both of my classes this semester are asking for a paper to be due every weekend, so I have two papers to write every week until the end of the semester --


4. And hours suddenly, for no apparent reason, shot up at Staples. So I just jumped from 20 hours a week to 29 this week, 29 next week and 35 the week after that. Which is great, as I'll finally make some money and be able to keep it, but goddamn.

  So... yeah. I have no idea what I'm going to do. I told this guy that I'd be able to have time to do the new webpage, and now I suddenly don't have that time, but it's too late. This is the most I've had to work a week at Staples in a long time... I asked to be brought down in hours because I didn't have enough time for school, and now I'm back up at hours and my two other jobs are being really demanding. I really, really need this money, and I'm trying to be grateful, but I am honestly wondering how I'm going to get through this semester.

  So don't worry about me if you haven't heard from me in a while... I'm drowning in a sea of work of all kinds. I'll try to post with any house news I get though.

Current Mood: busy Current Music: No Reservations Current Tags: house!, school: grad, state of amandiana, work

  So it's National Comment Reply Night. Gird your inboxes.


EDIT: Feh. Nevermind. It turns out I am way too lazy and most of the comments for stuff that was back months ago... so... yeah. Thanks for all of your nice comments to my posts though. Gosh there were very many woeful posts. Heh.

Current Mood: working Current Music: The Office Current Tags: lj

  So if the whole house thing wasn't enough, my hard-drive on my 6 month old computer decided it was going to die.

  I mean, the whole reason I switched to a desktop after my laptop dumped on me was so that if one piece decides to crap out, it's easy to replace. BUT WHY DID IT HAVE TO BE MY HARD DRIVE.

  Yes, everything important is backed up. But there was so much recent stuff I hadn't had time to back up yet. And... ffffffff before vacation in May I had gone through all my ipod playlists (all million bajillion of them), cleaned them up and improved them. It took me WEEKS. And of course I didn't back that up. AWESOME.



THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS

Current Mood: angry Current Tags: cheer up emo kid, computer woes, haterade

  So talking to the attorney today mostly just confirmed what I already knew from researching on the internet, but it was worth it to have it confirmed. So here's how things stand:

1. She does still own the house, and our lease was legal. We have to pay her September rent, which is unfortunate in that we have to talk to her again.

2. We do get to stay through our lease with the new owner, unless they are people who want to move in, in which case we get 90 days. Best case scenario, the new owner wants to continue renting with us. If not, none of us really feel it's worth staying just for a year and getting settled, only to have to move out next June like it's a dorm or something, so we will probably leave.

3. We need to inform the plaintiff (which is unfortunately not a bank but some weird mortgage company with no website and iffy contact info) that we are tenants.

4. The possibility of getting locked out is slim, illegal but still a possibility. Hopefully the fact that there are three of us here with varying work schedules will deter that even further... I'm usually home in the morning and Keith is here in the evening. I'm still terrified every time I turn the corner that I'm going to see a lock on the door, though.

5. Keith is going to look into actually purchasing the house from whoever buys it at auction (most likely a bank or the mortgage company). I think this is unlikely, but who knows.

  So right now it's just kind of a "wait and see" until September 23. We will probably go to the auction to accost whoever buys it to remind them that we are here. Over the weekend I've just kind of come to accept the fact that this is a reality and we'll most likely be moving soon. I'd just like to know whether I need to start looking for houses again as soon as possible... it's going to be a long month till September 23.

  I really hate that woman for getting us mixed up in this. I have better things to do with my life besides worry about this shit.

Current Mood: worried Current Music: The Guild - Do You Want to Date My Avatar Current Tags: house!

  Going to see an attorney today to talk about what we need to do (not actually hiring one, just asking one for advice). Hopefully we'll get (sorta) good news. I'll post about it.

Current Mood: anxious Current Tags: house!

  So. I was the happiest I've been in a long time, for a lovely, brief month, which was a wee bit tainted by the end of the semester and the god awful assignment... and now I'm the saddest I've been... in a very long while.

  Let's keep it simple: The house is foreclosed.

  This beautiful, too-good-to-be-true (what do you know, it really was!), perfect-for-us house... was rented to us by a real good for nothing bitch. Yesterday we got mail, addressed to her, from a foreclosure attorney. I panicked immediately, but everyone tried to persuade me that it may be for one of her other properties, or something. Later on, I did some research, figured out how to access public records online, and yep, sure thing, this house is foreclosed. It's been in the process of being in foreclosure since DECEMBER 2008. She lied through her teeth to us. She has a bunch of other properties in foreclosure, too, including her own house. And of course we can't get a hold of her.

  This house is going to be sold at auction September 23. We will have lived in it for less than three months.

  My mom says that there's a small chance that the new owner may want to rent it to us, and thanks to the bill signed by the President in May 2009, renter's rights are much better, and we are allowed, by law, at least 90 days to get our shit together and find a new place to live. Keith wouldn't even mind buying this house, except that since it's going up for auction it's probably not possible.

  I spent all of last night crying, but I'm getting better. I just don't understand how something like this could happen to me. What did I ever do to deserve it? I was really, really happy here.

  I PAINTED TWO FUCKING GODDAMN ROOMS.

Current Mood: depressed Current Tags: emo woe, haterade, house!, state of amandiana

  School is finally over, and I get two weeks without much stress. Except for work, which is goin' all crazy because it's back to school for public school kids. Sigh.

  The worst part about moving away from home is missing my beloved Bussy Box-Cat. I decided not to take him because he's old and expensive and creaky and I'm just worried that he'd hurt himself when I wasn't home, or something. He's better with mom and dad, who can afford his expensive medicine and food and will be able to keep a better eye on him. At least that's what I tell myself. There's been lots of crying.

  I think I've finally decided to get myself a pair of kitties (so they can keep each other company when I'm not home). I'd rather get actual kittens for once because a) I've never experienced the mass hysteria and hilarity that is apparently kittens and b) I'd like to not have somebody else's cat for once. I realize you get massive karma points for adopting an adult cat, which is why we got Buster, but you know, Buster rolled up in the house with his own ideas of how things were going to work. Which is fine. But I'd like to start out with a new kitty... snuggle it a lot so that it gets used to being held, get it used to wearing a collar (in case it gets out -- these will be inside kitties), get it on a good eating schedule so that it doesn't turn into a giant fatty like Bussy.

  Anyway, the Kitty-Finding Adventure will be on Wednesday. Expect pictures. So many pictures.

Current Mood: anxious Current Tags: the fam: pets

  Hey everyone, totally uncharacteristic of me, I haven't posted anything in almost a month. Things have been really... really busy here. I moved into a new house, put in some extra time at work, and got slammed with two end of term school projects all at the same time (one of which seems to be completely awry and the other is just a huge pain in the butt). I still haven't had time to completely unpack/organize because of the homework, and it's driving me up the wall. So no pictures yet... it'll have to wait till the end of the semester.

So here's some random stuff:

• House life is really nice. Keith and John sleep in really late, so in the mornings I get a lot of quiet time to myself, which is nice. I'm looking forward to Sara getting here, too. It's reminding me so much of being in college that last night, John stomped on the floor and my immediate reaction was to worry about the neighbors downstairs... that don't exist. First item on Keith's list was buy a giant TV... which I guess is something he's always wanted to do. It's like a 65" DLP TV. It's crazy stuff. Our living room still hasn't been put into any kind of order yet though, so we haven't gotten much use out of it yet.



• School is kicking my butt, but a visit from Krysti after the semester is over is going to be a light at the end of the tunnel.



• Saw HP6 and it was really good. Gotta say it was one of the top Harry Potter movies.



• Oddly enough, however, I am more excited about Om Shanti Om, which I saw for the first time the other night (hooray Netflix) after many recommendations (okay, two). I don't know if it was because of a) the song "Deewangi Deewangi", which basically was attempting to answer the question "how many Bollywood celebrities can we cram into one song?" or b) "Dhoom Tana" which used some pretty awesome CG to place the (totally gorgeous newbie) actress into the sets of old 70s Bollywood films, or c) this scene:
  
  

Current Mood: busy Current Music: Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi Current Tags: bollywood, fandom: harry potter, movies, school: grad

  Work has been pretty cool lately 'cause I'm only working 17-20 hours a week. Good for my mental health and homework, bad for money. Now that I'm moving out, I kinda need that money... so I was actually pleased that I got about 30 hours to work this week! Although it left me little time to pack (still haven't started yet D: ) or work on Sociology stuff (2 hours Sociology work = about 4 Staples work, and I can do it in my PJs, AND everyone is super sweet to me -- I heart my Sociology job), about $100 extra this week will be nice and help me out paying all those new bills I will suddenly find myself with!

  I've usually been working 4-9:30 on those days I do work, so things are chill, and people are chill, and we are all just chill. However, I worked 8-4 on Tuesday and 1-9:30 yesterday and it blew. So that's where all the mean people have been hiding! And last night everyone and their mom decided they needed stuff done ASAP TOMORROW MORNING HOMG and I forgot that tomorrow (today) was SATURDAY which means we open at 9 and not 8, so I was like "lol sure 9:30 we can do that lol." I left 5 jobs for Maria. Gah. Then proceeded to have bad dreams about customers continuing to submit jobs, so I woke up, looked at the clock, wondered "I wonder how Maria is doing with those," and then realized "OH FUH STORE DOESN'T OPEN TILL 9 AND OMG LEFT TWO JOBS DUE BETWEEN 9-9:30 OMG." *head desk*

  The worst thing about closing and leaving tons for someone else is the epic amounts of guilt for making that person start their day all crazy. I called her ahead of time and told her there was a lot, but at the time I didn't realize I had scheduled stuff to be due AT OPENING. Thankfully one only need to be comb bound (I had already done the printing), but another needed to be completely reproduced. Gah.

  Besides yesterday's crazy times, I also got yelled at on the phone (twice, same person), which is always nice... oh and then accidentally caused Maria to get an annoying/mean customer this morning, apparently (she told me when I called her)... so now I feel extra bad...

  I am like, so done with customer service. I actually like my copy center job; I love doing projects for people, I just dislike dealing with the meanies. Especially when I try my hardest to be all nice and smiley to everyone, no matter how craptacular I am feeling. OMG BE NICE EVERYBODY.

Current Mood: blah Current Music: Samurai Champloo Current Tags: slave labor

  I'm having one of those days where I've compiled such a huge list of stuff I need to do that I don't know where to start and end up doing nothing all day long. Sigh. Gotta go to work in about an hour so at least that solves that problem. :P

  One week till we can start moving in. I just want to get it over with. I have so much to do... :(

Current Mood: listless Current Tags: state of amandiana

  Things are, for once, going amazing here. We've been spending our last few weeks looking at different houses, and at first it seemed like kinda a bust, having to always choose between having a washer/dryer or having a garage, or between lots of space or a remodeled interior, and finally we just got lucky and found a house that had... everything. We had lunch with the lady today, and though even after initially telling Keith she wasn't really down to renting to a bunch of 20-something roommates, I guess we were able to convince her that we weren't partying crazy folk.

  Went to see the house tonight and it's... beautiful. More than I could have ever asked for. I was trying to be very open-minded with these houses, realizing that we can't really ask for too much and probably won't get too much, but this house is beyond anything I would have ever imagined. Better than my house or any of my friends' houses, honestly. It's a huge, 2005, 2000+ sq. ft. home, four bedrooms, two bathrooms, tons of closet space, huge kitchen with brand new appliances, plus a washer and dryer, also pretty much brand new, whirlpool garden tub omg, and cat-friendly. And it's only had one tenant before us.

  And we get to move in July 1! I can't believe it's only two weeks away!

Current Mood: chipper Current Tags: house!, state of amandiana

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMANDA N!!!

Current Mood: okay Current Tags: homies

  A friend showed me this and it is AMAZING. There's also one of Martin Luther King Jr.'s "I Have a Dream" speech, but I actually like this one the best. It's by the same people who do "Auto-Tune the News."



  And here's the best episode of "Auto-Tune the News," in my opinion. The others are really funny but this one is my favorite.

Current Mood: busy Current Music: Auto-Tune the News Current Tags: amusing shit, the internets

I dislike myself so much sometimes... I believe my friends when they say I'm fun to be around, but my personality flaws are so glaring and obvious that I don't know how they put up with the bad long enough to get to the good.

I hate that I talk so much sometimes, and I often interrupt people even though I don't mean to. I also tend to complain a lot about every little thing I think instead of keeping it to myself. I realize I'm doing it but it's like I can't stop myself. I hate that I have absolutely no control over my own behavior. I try but all this crap still comes out of my mouth. Stuff people don't care about, complain, complain, complain. It's like all I know how to do to make conversation is just to complain about things that irritate me, and it's like I love doing it, but I hate it. Why is complaining so satisfying? Why can't I control myself?

It's one thing with my friends, who are kind of just used to it, but I feel really bad when I meet new people and I'm like "Hi! Nice to meet you! Here's a list of things I hate!" or when Keith brings me along to hang out with his friends and I'm like "Hi! I'm cold! I'm hungry! I'm stressed out from school! Sometimes I feel like my life is a complete failure! :D How are you!?" Man, I don't want to be that girlfriend that everyone has to put up with.

The worst part is, I'm always so self-conscious about this that when someone, no matter how nicely, points out to me that I'm kinda acting not my greatest, I get super butthurt and embarrassed and then either turn into a giant bitch or start crying, or both in any particular order. (This entry prompted by Keith, as nicely as possible, admitting that he was pretty tired of hearing me griping about ____, and me... getting all butthurt, clamping up for the rest of the time I was there, and then crying all the way home about how much I suck... then realizing that this was like the fourth time I've done this to him, sending him stupid text message apologies and being a big dumb girl in general... it was a mess. Thankfully hormones are always there for me to blame.)

I need to pretend that I am Victorian lady and if I don't behave there will be a scandal and everyone will give me the stink eye the next time I go into the teahouse.

Current Mood: embarrassed Current Tags: emo woe, me